Net Dating Secrets

Do looks interest me?

darren — Tue, 31 Jul 2007 08:22:48 +0000

There are many people who insist on taking a look at the other person’s picture before actually committing to a date. They might have their reasons of course, but I, for one, feel that such a decision based largely on looks is more suitable for a casual relationship. It is bound to sizzle off after some time. A thing of beauty is thing of beauty. But we are humans and a little more complex and require other elements to stimulate us.

Looks are not the most important thing and should never be used as the deciding factor in a serious relationship.

A human being is more like a diamond, which when held against light reflects and deflects light so that a myriad of colors are seen. We’re complex.

We have a lot of interest and the interests of one person need not match with the interests of another. But thankfully the interests are not as numerous as human beings. So we are bound to find a lot of people who share our interests.

So, what are your interests? That is something for you to find out.

Your interests could be something like sports or outdoor activities. Or you could think of interests like social work or cross-words or religious interests. As we are complex beings are interests may be varied and wide, this is good thing, but you will need to narrow them down. You cannot be all things to all people. Stick with the main interests and the ones that you feel passionate about. Sport is an interest but what sport ?

Horses- Dressage or horse jumping. Car racing- Formula 1 or rally driving.

These are just 2 examples but they, you might like all things about horses but you probably have preference and that is were your passion will come from if you find someone with the same interest.
Once you find out your interests you will know more about yourself, and more about the person that you want to spend more time with.

First Steps

darren — Fri, 27 Jul 2007 08:21:47 +0000

Doing things on the internet, is simple really, logon put in a search term/address and of you go. It might be tempting to go straight to a singles chatroom and try to find somebody who would interest you.

But STOP, chat rooms by there anonymity attract people who are not as they seem and don’t have the same honorable intentions as you. As you start asking questions, answering their questions you will start to get back the answers that you want to hear! After time it will get very frustrating, everything starts of well, you are having a nice conversation with a person and warming up when all of the sudden, the topic moves towards sex. You let out a sigh and either have to bar messages from that person and risk the person bad mouthing you in a public chat room. Usually you have to leave the chat room all together.
In other words, it is the easiest thing to get someone to sleep with you but if you are looking for something more enduring, like a partner for life, then you are going to have to be a little more patient. The pick of the litter is not easy to find. But you do find it; it is going to be worth the effort.
So instead of going into a singles’ chat room, what you could do is, you could try the whole thing out from a different angle. You could try working backwards.

Sit for a minute or two and try and think about the things that interest you and things that you would find interesting in a person.

By ‘things’ over here I am not referring to physical attributes. I am not referring to something that might interest you in a person’s physical appearance. Again the distinction has to be drawn between a serious relationship and a casual relationship. In a casual relationship, the importance is always for the physical attributes. We are more concerned with what the person looks like and what the person has been endowed with.

On the other hand, if we have a serious relationship, then the physical qualities are not so important. Compatibility is probably the most important factor over here. Along with that there are certain qualities that obviously we will be looking out for. We are talking about qualities of the mind. After all, beauty is only skin deep!

Astrology again, but different

darren — Thu, 26 Jul 2007 08:21:29 +0000

Our past lives do they catch up with us, do they control our destiny in this live and in our ultimate destiny.

Karma Astrology could answer these questions and help you discover your souls journey.

Karma translated means action, and in Karma astrology it defines what happens to you in this life is a result of what you’ve done or what has been done to you in a previous life, whether benevolently or selfishly motivated, it eventually comes back to you. Could be this life or a life hundreds of years ago.

Karmic astrology uses the positions of the plants in your natal chart to explain the reasons why you are the way you are and why you act the way you do. Some might think I can’t change anything then! But Karmic astrology provides you with guidance to resolve past life situations so as to wipe slate clean and make room for more positive karma in your current life.

You might be asking yourselves what has this got to do with finding my ideal partner ?

The answer depends on how you view Astrology in general, if you feel that you want to get the best from your relationships and know that you have given your best, than knowing yourself fully is surely the key.

Astrology is a vast world, one full of cosmic influences, no one is totally isolated and there are strong powers a work out there.

Do you believe that everybody has there ideal soul mate out there and all you need to do is find them ?

I do and was lucky enough to find mine over 20 years ago, it was love at first sight but it does not mean that it’s been easy. But if we had had tools such has Karmic astrology we might have understood some of the more difficult times.

Nobody is totally isolated in the world, and I am not talking about the internet and cell phones, I am talking about the great cosmic web of which we are all part of and that controls our daily life’s.

Perhaps astrology of all sorts is part of the manual for leading a more confident, wiser and happier life.

Astrology and Dating

darren — Tue, 24 Jul 2007 10:38:30 +0000

Dating Astrology

How compatible are we with certain birth signs, there is a whole world of astrology hat can be used as a tool for relationships.
Planets can carry extra weight in relationships, the Sun shows us our true self, our courage and vitality.
Some astrologer use asteroids. The asteroid Juno relates to marriage, partnership, and empowerment. Ceres is a nurturing influence. Vesta is purposeful, passionate, and deals with protecting the home.

Plants are more commonly known for astrology and a few examples are given below.
Venus relates to love, affection, values, aesthetics and affinity, and shows which qualities must be present for you to love and be attracted to a person or situation, and where you’re most likely to find love.
The Moon symbolizes your needs for emotional security and acceptance, and shows where you’re likely to receive support and attention from others.
Mars shows action, passion, sexuality, initiative, taking a stand and willingness to fight.

Birthcharts are also used and show us how compatible we are with others, there will be some points of compatibility and some points of stress. A sign of stress is not necessary seen as negative thing it can be exciting, challenging, stimulating it can of course be antagonistic and worrying. The level of detail should not be that great when the couple first meet an overview of each persons plant yields basic information. Sometimes a friends bitrhtdate helps and gives an idea of the compatibility of a certain type of person.
Once the relationship becomes serious and marriage is on the horizon a more detailed reading could help with possible further conflicts that might arise and are totally un-foreseen at this stage. The more in-depth reading also helps for both parties to understand the relationship that they will enter into.

The reading will suggest the issues and these can be discussed and addressed. This stops things building up in the relationship and become areas of hurt that take a long time to be healed and worked out.

There are many aspects of astrology that can help in finding your ideal mate and/or strengthen existing relationships. But you do have to be a believer!

Online dating bringing the world together

darren — Fri, 20 Jul 2007 08:42:28 +0000

For thousands of years human beings have been chasing partners.

There are many cultures across the world and they all choose partners differently. However online dating is bringing cultures and societies closer.

Yes there are of course still language barriers but if you scan through the internet you will find commonalty on most sites, Happy smiling people from all over the globe.

At an instant in our own privacy we can specify gender, age group, locality, all at a click of a button. With no commitment and free of charge.And if we don’t like what the search provides, we can start again. All of this gives us a sense of belonging, feeling involved, part of a group of people all searching for the right partner.

I find searching over the internet on free membership site helps me understand what I am looking for at no cost. It’s a bit like test driving a car before buying, who walks into a car showroom and knows exactly what they want ? Don’t get me wrong there are people who know what they want from the start, and some sites help you more than other with refining your search. Check out the services they offer as well, a key element to enjoying your time with the site.

Do look through the free sites first, this will also help you decide what site is best for you with no commitment. And don’t stick to just English sites there are many cultures out there that could spice up your life and take you to some wonderful places around the world.

Happy surfing.

Bless your beautiful hide

darren — Thu, 19 Jul 2007 09:34:00 +0000

Bless your beautiful hide
Wherever you may be
We haven’t met yet
But I’m willing to bet
That you’re the one for me!

And so goes the song from the Hollywood classic of yesteryear, ‘Seven Brides for Seven Brothers’ and this song is precisely what online dating is. Online dating is in, in, in! Gone are the days when mothers used to escort their daughters to ball room dances and help them choose partners from the boys.

That was something that passed into oblivion with the last century or even earlier than that. In those days single people met at parties and other social gatherings and had to choose partners judging just by outer appearances, a very superficial choice indeed! Nowadays thanks to the Internet, the outward appearance has become the last criterion for selection.

Why You Need To Know More...

But wait! Online dating is not all fun and games and there are a lot of things that a person has to know about Online dating before one gets into the intricacies of it. Online dating may seem to be the simplest thing in the world but it is not. It should be viewed in all earnestness or things could go hay wire. Every game has its rules and unless you know all the rules you just can’t become a good player and eventually a winner.

Tastes Differ

People! There are so many kinds around. Just look around you, how many people you know look the same? Sizes, builds, shapes, features, they are all so different. And that is just about the external appearances. And when it comes to character, it becomes a very different story altogether. Take a trip down memory lane, go back to your class rooms and take a look around.

A class room is one place where we get to interact with a lot of different people on a very close basis. We get to rub shoulders and corners with very different people and we get to know them on a one to one basis. So how many of your class mates did you genuinely like?

I don’t mean like them as class mates but as people. Was it easy to get along with all of them? That is why we often end up with best friends or clichés in class rooms.

We do not and do not have to like every body. The tastes and interests of one person might match with ours while the tastes and interests of another person may be at complete logger heads with ours.

So when it comes to dating, it is very much the same story. But over here there are some strings attached. Unlike in a class room contact, most people go on dates with a more impressive purpose, and that is to find life mate. There are a hundred and one things that should match before two people decide to spend the rest of their lives with each other.

Many people are of the opinion that they do not need any help with dating. They may be right because no body knows a person’s tastes and likes better than the person himself or herself.

You’ve Got Mail

darren — Wed, 18 Jul 2007 11:12:52 +0000

Once upon a time, dating sites were almost a taboo subject, A strong social stigma surrounded online dating websites with many viewing those that frequented them as socially inept, weird and/or undesirable.

However, today these stigmas belong to the past. All over the world, millions of single people frequent dating sites and as such they have become the most widely used form of dating. According to a study conducted by the Online Publishers Association and COM Score Networks, 450 million dollars alone was spent by Americans on personal services and dating sites in 2004. This number is expected to increase even further over the next few years as more and more people experience dating sites for themselves.

One factor which has contributed greatly to the popularity of dating sites is the Hollywood film industry. In 1998, the romantic comedy “You’ve Got Mail” starring Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan was a huge box office hit and was responsible for bringing the world of online dating firmly into the public eye. Since the mid 90’s, the stigma attached to online dating was disappearing. Today, more and more people are seeing the medium as a successful way to meet people for friendship, dates and relationships.

One of several advantages dating sites offer over more traditional forms of dating is the selection process. Instead of hoping to meet the right person at a party, club or bar, dating sites allow you to explore the profiles of members, finding those that have similar interests and outlooks. You can also communicate with members before deciding to date, meaning you have greater control over the level of contact and far more personal safety and anonymity than public places allow.

The rejection factor is also removed significantly in online dating. If you strike up a conversation with someone and the person decides not to respond, you can simply tell yourself that you didn’t have enough in common with them. The fear of rejection is far easier to manage than in live situations when you are face to face. You are also not confined to the same social circle and can widen your net, which is not often possible in live social situations. You can choose which location you base your search on and even make contact with people from all over your country or in international locations.

While some still criticize online dating for failing to eliminate the dangers of dating, the reality is that bad experiences are just as likely to happen when you meet someone in s a social situation. At an online dating website, you have more of a chance to check someone out before you go out with them. It is important to remember that the dangers of dating exist across all mediums and not simply on the internet.
Due to the rising popularity of online dating sites, over a thousand now exist as of 2006. Some of the most popular sites include Yahoo Personals, Match.com and American Singles. There has never been a better time to find a special person online so why not check out an online dating website today?

20 Ways to make someone Smile

darren — Tue, 17 Jul 2007 12:31:27 +0000

20 Ways To Make Someone

Smile

Do you want to put a smile on someone’s face today? Maybe make their day a little better. It won’t cost you a single penny or much time to do just that. And because smiling is contagious, it probably won’t just be one person you make smile today.

Here are 20 ways to turn that frown upside down.

1. Send some flowers to your partner at work.
2. Compliment a friend or work colleague on their appearance.
3. Donate something to charity.
4. Take a friend out to lunch.
5. Let someone know you miss them.
6. Make a surprise telephone call to your partner at work, just to say hi.
7. Hold a door open for someone walking behind you.
8. Hug your partner for no reason.
9. Leave a joke on a friends answer machine.
10. Send a card to a friend letting them know what a good friend they are.
11. Give up your seat on the train to someone when there aren’t any left.
12. Share your umbrella on a rainy day.
13. Ask a friend if they need anything while you’re out shopping.
14. When it’s raining, plan an indoor picnic with your children.
15. Leave a love letter somewhere where your partner will find it.
16. Send someone an unusual and unexpected gift like sex toys.
17. Tell your child you’re proud of them.
18. Tell someone you thought about them the other day.
19. Cook a surprise meal for your partner one night, especially if they normally do the cooking.
20. Tell your partner you love them. ever

Did you know it takes only 17 muscles to smile, but 43 to frown. Why waste all that energy frowning when you could just smile.

Here are 5 more facts about smiling.

1. Women smile more than men.
2. Smiling releases endorphins that make us feel better.
3. We are all born with the ability to smile, it’s not something we learn from others.
4. A smile is a universal expression of happiness.
5. A smiling person is thought to be a more pleasant, attractive, sociable, sincere and competent than a non-smiling person.

Just remember, smiling is the easiest and cheapest way of improving your looks and you never know who might smile back.

The Secret is Charm

darren — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 09:27:34 +0000

The Secret is Charm

All the things that have been said about how you can create a favorable impression. There is something that is equally or even more important than that, and that is to make the other person feel comfortable. Help the other person relax.

Any way you have been chatting for quite some time so you do know a great deal about each other. The best thing you can do is to ease the tension and break the ice. Sometimes the ice gets so thick that you can literally feel it. Break it up by cracking a joke or two.

But the joke should be spontaneous and in keeping with the situation or else it will fall flat. Do not rehearse a joke because a rehearsed joke sounds…well…rehearsed.

The key word here is charm. Use all the charm that you can muster. Try to be as considerate and as thoughtful as possible. Do not dominate the conversation but try to get the other person talking. People generally love to talk about themselves so try to get the other person talking by asking about the person’s work. Show interest in whatever the other person says.

Try to be a good conversationalist. A good conversationalist is not a person who talks well, but is one who listens well as well. So try to be a good listener. And while you are listening try not to get distracted by something else or the other person might feel that you are losing interest in what he or she is saying.

Then comes the question, “what do you do if you find that the other person is dominating the conversation?”

Well, in that case listen patiently for a minute or two and then give a subtle sign like a raised eyebrow or a smile through the corner of your mouth. If the other person is intelligent enough, he or she will get the cue. If not, then take your chance, you might have to listen to this person for the rest of your life.

Humor rarely fails. But again take care not to over do it. There is only one thing worse than a total lack of humor and that is too much humor.

Stress out of dating

darren — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 09:58:08 +0000

Lets face it, dating can be quite stressful, but it could and should be fun. The key to this is communicating. The magic could be there from the first time you meet, and become serious after the first couple of dates. In most cases the relationship develops gradually over time as the couple get to know each other and this is why it is key to use some communication tips to help you along.

Tip#1                                                                                                                                                                                                                     The couple might have met through a dating agency, dating website or even a forum, so they must have found something of interest about each other to want to meet face to face.
There is of course the opportunity to see the other person in the flesh, so to speak but they need to find common ground with each other, such as a similar interest. The interest might be something previously highlighted by the dating agency and if so finding some information on the subject always helps the conversation flow nicely. Lets face it, we like people who are interested in what we are interested in.
You can always ask, what are you interested/hobbies, what do you do in your spare time. A list of things will follow, but the key is to listen carefully and find something you like or want to talk about. This way you are genuinely interested, and not trying to talk about something that does not interest you just to cover up any embarrassing silences.

  Tip#2
   No matter how serious a person is, chances are that person still likes to laugh at something. Humor is necessary in any dating scenario, because not only does it lighten what might be a stressful situation, but it also creates the opportunity for the couple to create private jokes between each other, which is a fun way of solidifying a relationship.

Tip#3
Keep the conversation light, you don’t have to get personal now you can wait until the relationship becomes more serious. Spilling your heart out will make you seem desperate. And could leaving you feeling you gave all but they didn’t respond, which will make future dates more daunting.

Tip#4                                                                                                                                                                                                            Body language conveys more about how we feel to another person than the words we speak. Sitting back arms folded,legs crossed shows that you are not interested, which also conveys that you are not an interesting person. Clearly leaning too close to someone invading there personal space to soon is also not a good way to start either. Things are easily done subconsciously and could give the wrong message to someone you are genuinely interested in.
So relax and be yourself, after all you are the person that they have chosen to be with at this time.

All of the above is to help and take the stress out of dating, remember it is meant to be a enjoyable experience !